Which means I’m at a bit of a crossroads. The pressure is on a bit.
Do I go back to being an employee (albeit a better, hopefully more confident and skilled one) or do I take a plunge on an idea and become an entrepreneur?
I’ve definitely ruled out being a freelancer – which by Seth’s definition means that I only make money when I’m the one doing the work. I want to make money in my sleep (on vacation, talking to my mom, etc.), not be dependent on my personal efforts.
So that leaves me with employee vs. entrepreneur. Employee means I have a boss, work for someone else. Entrepreneur means I’ve started a business that makes money whether I’m there or not.
I’ve been battling back and forth with this one. Employee just seems like such a cop-out, like I’ve resigned myself to something that I wanted to change. And yet, employee might be exactly what I am at heart. I talked about this a little before, but now I’m down to the heart of it.
One thing that’s kept me from taking the entrepreneur route in the past was two-fold: fear of failure (duh!!) and dreams bigger than my head could handle. Pretty much the second fed the first. When you have elephant sized dreams, it gets overwhelming trying to realize them.
I have a dream now, a vision that I’m actually excited about. It’s only been three months, but I feel already a different sense. For once, I have a handle on what it takes to eat the elephant, to take this gargantuan idea and break it down into something that makes it real.
And for once, I think I might be ready to do it, to take make the scarier choice. Wow.